"Suppose God wants to teach you to say, "I know how to be abased"--are you ready to be offered up like that? Are you ready to be not so much as a drop in a bucket--to be so hopelessly insignificant that you are never thought of again in connection with the life you served? Are you willing to spend and be spent; not seeking to be ministered unto, but to minister?" Oswald Chamber
Not sure how many people will ever see this but I have to put it out there anyway.
If I have ever done anything to make you feel better, encouraged you or even just lightened your day; then you find yourself in a very bad place and the first thing you think about or want to be around is me....then I have failed.
No human being is EVER supposed to be sought first over Jesus. And this is not just some compliment-fishing-I-really-want-your-accolades post. I'm VERY serious.
I understand the need for human contact. I understand how tricky it is to let someone know that what they have said or done has helped you and you just want to express gratitude. I get it. However, if that gratitude is not based in the knowledge and absolute assurance that Jesus is the one who is seeking to give you comfort....joy....peace (we are just the conduit), you might as well be grateful for the hospital building rather than the organ donor who saved your life.
It took a mouthy rooster and a spot light, but Peter and Paul finally got it. These two men originally thought they would do anything for God. Purge all evil for him. Follow him to the death. But it didn't take Jesus long to show them just how far from the truth they had traveled. I've gone down that path. I wish I hadn't. Jesus goes to such unbelievable lengths to reach you. He masterminds so many events just to show you how much he loves you. He gives us these marvelous treasures and what do we do? We worship/idolize the container the treasure is delivered in rather than the treasure itself. Over and over again.
Looking back on my life, I see two different types of people. People that made an impression and people that made an impact. I remember the people that made an impression. They stand out in the way a favorite music artist or popular comedian might stand out. I remember laughing or crying over something they said or did but I don't actually remember what they were saying...just that it was funny or sad. Either way...it entertained me. However, the people that made an impact...those who spoke truth to me regardless of what my reaction might be....those are the people that God used to make a very legitimate difference in my life. I would tell you their names but you wouldn't have a clue who they are. And that's exactly the way they want it.
I understand that God still calls some of us to be his john-the-baptist-crying-out-in-the-desert followers. But I feel pretty certain that those who answer this type of call rarely, if ever, are put on a pedestal. Typically what they have to say falls more into the category of speak-first-then-duck-and-cover. The only thing they live in danger of is being killed for speaking His truth. Rather than being idolized because they are witty, wordy and can entertain the masses. Icon vs. Conduit.
If you could see just how black and filthy my soul really is....see it outside of the blood of Christ, I doubt you would ever seek my counsel, friendship or even acquaintance. In fact, as in the days of Christ, you would see me as a spiritual leper and avoid me at all costs. But Christ took that filthy, putrid soul and wore it like his own skin on the cross. He bled all over it, washing it from the inside out. Then he handed it back to me.... beautifully white and pure...void of any defect...asking only for my love and belief. I don't know if I'll ever be that person that Chambers talks about in the quote at the beginning of this post. But I can hope that he will continue to work in my heart toward that end.
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